I could either write a bunch of shit on here that you won't understand, or you can just book the service with confidence knowing I won't destroy the integrity of your natural nail plate.
This is the shit you want if you're looking for more strength & durability on your natural nail. Think acrylic, except it doesn't smell, it's free from chemicals, and it won't give you cancer. Don't be like my ex-husband and neglect me- you'll be coming in for fills every 2-4 weeks. **(P.S. if you're wondering why the booking times are long, it's because I'm not a chop shop and I do your shit right the first time.)
If you haven’t gotten a fill in 4+ weeks, then you will need to choose this service. Why? Because it’s a hell of a lot more work. Don’t wait so long next time, dummy.
Come in with stubbies, leave with long baddies. No, you cannot use these as your new can opener. Don’t be a fucking idiot.
Jk, there’s nothing normal about this pedicure. I can’t guarantee you’ll have a good time, but I CAN guarantee you’ll have a clean foot tub and some soft ass feet at the end. **(P.S. if you’re wondering why the booking times are so long, it’s because I’m thorough and damn good at what I do.)
This one’s for the VIPs—Very Important Phalanges. Designed specifically for diabetic clients, this service is all about safety, softness, and serious attention to detail. No aggressive scrubbing, no risky nipping, and absolutely no oversight when it comes to ensuring suspicious areas you can’t see haven’t popped up. Just clean, gentle care with disinfected, clean tools, expert trimming, and hydration your feet will write home about (if they had thumbs). Because your feet do a lot—and when you’ve got diabetes, they deserve nothing less than a first-class experience with someone who actually knows what they’re doing.
This is a non-cosmetic foot care service focused on health and hygiene rather than aesthetics. It can benefit anyone with fungal nails, ingrown toenails, corns, extreme calluses, cracked heels, athlete’s foot, plantar warts, and general foot pain and disorders. We will focus on debridement, nail correction, callus control, and health education. No polish or paraffin wax will be used unless deemed safe. **(P.S. DO NOT trim your toenails or clip off dead skin out of fear of embarrassment before you come. While bodily autonomy is respected here, you no longer own your feet once you become my client. #sorrynotsorry)
If you’ve got a fucked up toenail, and you want it to not look fucked up, I can reconstruct it using a flexible gel designed SPECIFICALLY for toenails. No, this isn’t acrylic. No, I won’t put acrylic on your toes (yall gotta stop with that shit, srsly). ‼️This is NOT a stand-alone service, and MUST be added on to a pedicure.‼️
Your toenail’s been a pain in the ass, and it’s time to shut that shit down. I use a badass little titanium alloy strip that sits across the top of your nail and forces it to act right. No blades, no blood, no drama. This thing is waterproof, sweatproof, and built to survive your nonsense. You’ll come back every 4–6 weeks for a tune-up. And no, you can’t wear polish while it’s on, so don’t fucking ask. ‼️This service is to be added on to a pedicure. I will not apply the brace without one.‼️
Y'all be asking for the dumbest shit, I swear to god.
You fucked your nail up and now you need it fixed. Don’t you dare tell me it was because you used your nail as a tool, or you were being an idiot. Lie to me- tell me Stone Cold Steve Austin came and pummeled you. Tell me you were trying new butt stuff and got your hand stuck. Tell me Hitler came back from the dead and you had no choice but to knock him dead in the face while your friend held your earrings and hair. This appointment requires an apology and Starbucks.
If you want to come in and cry, need a polish change, or just have a random ass need that's not listed, then pick this. DO NOT pick this to try to squeeze into a 30-minute slot just because nothing else was available...I will hunt you down and shit on your lawn.